Book Review: Friendship for Grownups by Lisa Whelchel

Amazing, Amazing, AMAZING! I have read several books with a similar theme as this, but Friendship for Grownups has surpassed them all. Lisa Whelchel creates such a warm atmosphere through her words; she has the ability to encourage and convict within the same sentence. She paints a clear picture of how God has pricked her heart in the area of adult friendships and has really opened herself to be used by God to do the same to others. Lisa Whelchel describes the ups and downs of a friendship, physically, emotionally and spiritually. She fully understands true friendship and does a magnificent job giving a full description of every avenue friendship takes. I have learned more about myself and what it is to be a true friend in order to find true friends than I ever have before!

No Bread but More Dough

It's a dumb title; I know. I just thought it was clever. I haven't had any bread orders in months, which is completely fine with me. I'm not running around trying to keep my girls occupied while I sweat away in the kitchen kneading and stirring and baking. The only thing I miss is the money. Perhaps this is God's way of telling me to slow down, take some time for my family, and forget about the money for a bit.

On another money-related issue (ha!), I've been careful to watch my grocery spending. I have stockpiled a fair amount of things. I do not like the word stockpile. It sounds too Y2K-ish for me, but I guess it IS what I'm doing. I have 15 cereal boxes in the pantry right now. No, I will not be buying any more for several months! That's a nice thing - being able to cross off one of my weekly purchases. We go through a large amount of cereal each month. Between snacks and actual bowls for breakfast, we consume about a box-worth a week. So, 15 boxes isn't really that much when I start to calculate it all out. I have 5 boxes of cake mix. I love making my own from scratch, but when I can get a box for about $.20 I am definitely grabbing a few. Oh, and yes I did remember to get enough frosting for them. One of my biggest annoyances is going to make a cake mix and finding that I didn't pick up any frosting when I bought it. Seems logical - you buy one, you buy the other - but it's happened several times over the past several years that I've wanted to make a quick cake and frost it to take somewhere or have for dessert that night and I have cake but no frosting. This time, I'm prepared. :)

I went to Meijer today to grab some very cheap and some free items. I have been receiving, by mail, high-value coupons for items and even several FREE item coupons. I forget why I received it, but a box of Kraft goodies came yesterday with some coupons that included 2 for free items. When I write to companies online to thank them or tell them how much we like their items (and I don't lie - I tell them what specifically we like and why and sometimes some things we don't like), they are very appreciative and almost always send coupons by mail as a Thank You. My receipt today said I saved $31 with coupons and another $30 or so with store sales....that's over $60 in savings! I paid $44.08 for a cart full of groceries and was able to get several of some things to stock up. I am extremely thankful for what I've learned lately about grocery shopping, coupons, sales, and purposeful shopping.

Next week, I plan to only buy produce (no milk...I bought 2 today that will last til the next paycheck), so that'll hopefully leave us with leftover budgeted grocery money. My goal is to have $20 left over on the 31st to roll into our camping fund. We are so excited to go camping in July. Iris is the only one that remembers going camping the last time. Lily and Addy will have so much fun. I hope Addy's walking by then; it will be dreadful to have to carry her around all week. Too hot! And I'm hoping she will be weaned by then....selfishly. :) Too hot!

God has entrusted me with so much for my family. It's amazing the responsibility we have as parents - feed, clothe, raise our children, financial planning and budgeting, etc. It is my job to guard my daughters' eyes and ears from things they shouldn't see or hear. TV is my biggest enemy right now. It is so hard to find afternoon cartoons for the girls that don't have "stupid" or "dumb" or "i hate you" in them. My girls repeat everything and when they hear it on TV they think it's ok. I know I let them watch too much TV, so this week it has been my goal to only let them watch a total of 3 hours a day. I know some of you are cringing right now that they are allowed to watch that much a day - believe me, that's a huge cut in hours. I usually let the TV just play all day. Even if no one's watching; it's background noise. But shows and commercials come on that I'm not paying attention to and before I know it my girls are glued to Spongebob or some other older kid show that uses language I don't let my children use. So, as much as I'd like to say I let them watch only educational shows and no more than 2 hours a day....well, we're getting there. No Spongebob anymore; I've said that before and found myself putting it on for them so they'll stop whining while I cook dinner - but not anymore! And no more than 3 hours a day. No TV during breakfast, no kid shows for Iris while the other 2 nap, no TV for lunch or dinner (that's not a huge change, they don't usually watch during those meals), and only shows that I know will not be using bad language. Disney and PBS are pretty good bets for nice language. And I don't allow myself more than an hour of TV during the day. I could get carried away with silly shows during naptime but I have other things I should be doing (what's that Proverbs 31 verse about idleness? whatever it says, that's what I want to be doing).

As my youngest is whining, I'm thinking about how easy it would be right now to let them go downstairs and watch cartoons to keep them quiet for a while. Nope. They've used up their hours today and so have I. So, I am finding other ways to spend our time - catching up on blogging, organizing things we've gotten out throughout the day, and soon I will start dinner. To think of all those hours I've wasted watching unimportant shows during the day when I should have been doing things to bring honor and glory to God - keeping my home orderly, budgeting or planning grocery outings, interacting with my children, or (more importantly!) spending time reading my Bible and praying. I have slacked so much lately with that. I've gotten away from my routine of morning exercise and Bible reading before the girls get up. I need that; I need that time to be quiet and just read and talk to God and ask for His help throughout the day that is starting. I am so frazzled otherwise; I lose my temper too quickly, I snap at the girls, I have zero patience, I am self-centered, I waste money on impulse purchases, I waste time on things I shouldn't be doing. God wants to hear from me; He wants me to ask Him for things. It needs to be a priority - an early morning priority before I get lost in the day. I am no good to my family if I haven't touched base with God first.

Tomorrow is a new day.

The Big Picture

I have to get this blog in before I get the girls bathed and in bed. Tonight, I just want to lie on the couch and zone out watching tv. I have to be careful, though, because my youngest is trying to grab the laptop, and my older 2 are wrestling about 3 feet away from me. What was I thinking?!

This week is the second week of the paycheck, so funds are touch and go this week....for lack of a better description. :) I shopped on Thursday for this week's actual groceries, so I will just be grabbing my CVS, Walgreens, and Target deals/steals/freebies this week until payday on Friday. Then we have my brother's wedding on Saturday, so we'll be out of town Friday and Saturday, and with church on Sunday....looks like those groceries will have to hold us over til next Monday. (crossing my fingers)

This morning, I rushed around during my oldest's 30 minute ballet class and ran over to Walgreens. Here's my shopping detail:

Bought Schick Hydro 5 (sale price of $7.99, and 5 RR's back)
Quilted Northern 12 double rolls (sale price of $5.99 - not great - with no RR's)
Used $5 off coupon for Schick
Used $.50 off coupon Quilted Northern
Had 4 RR's left over from last week's trip (had to buy 2 $.33 caramels at checkout to use my two 2 RR's - stupid Walgreens rules!)
Paid $6.60 out of pocket and got 5 RR's back....not bad!

After naps this afternoon, the girls and I ran to CVS. Of course, their scanner was out of paper, so I couldn't print any extra coupons and the line was too long once they refilled it....I was definitely not going to wait in line with my 3 little ones! So I continued with my purchases, hopefully without missing out on bonus coupons for the 3 items we bought. :)

Bought Jumbo Huggies (sale price of $8.49, and 2 ECB's back)
Gallon of Milk (sale $2.59 and 1 ECB back)
Carefree Liners (sale $1.00 for 22 pack)
Used $2 Huggies coupon - that I got when I submitted a feedback email online to them!
Used $1 off any Carefree item
Used 5 ECB's from last week's trip
Paid $5.09 out of pocket and got 3 ECB's back....again, not bad!

We rushed over to Target, where I transferred my Rx from CVS...and used a coupon to get a $10 gift card with the Rx transfer.
Paid $5 for the Rx, got $10 gift card!!
Bought Scrubbing Bubbles (no longer at $7.99 sale price, but was only $8.69 not on sale)
Used $5 off Scrubbing Bubbles Starter.
Bought construction paper and kid safety scissors
Total was $8.70, paid with gift card.
Used a coupon to get another $5 gift card when I purchase the Scrubbing Bubbles.
Walked out with $1.30 left on the one card and another $5 gift card. Only paid $5 for the Rx!

The girls made "cards" for Dad while I made dinner. What a great deal day! Hoping to get over to Jewel in the morning to pick up a few more Gatorade and Baby Basics diapers (with my $4 off coupon) to use up an expiring $4 Jewel Catalina. And THAT should be the end of shopping for the week.

Now, I just have to find something to wear for the wedding and we'll be all set! I found that it was so easy to find things to wear for nice occasions while I was pregnant - something stretchy and some sandals and I was all set. Now I actually have to put some thought into it! Haha. Regardless of what I wear, it'll be a great time and I'm so excited for my brother and my soon-to-be sister-in-law!

Movie Night

I had movie night tonight with the girls. We had a pizza picnic in the living room while we watched Shrek the Third. Normally, I would NOT let them eat dinner on the floor in the living room, but I figured we could do something fun since we were without Dad tonight and they were slightly bummed about that.

After we ate, my 2 year old came over by me and said "I lub zu mama". I almost cried. I didn't even initiate it, she just came over to tell me. It was the sweetest thing ever.

I am constantly amazed by my children. They can frustrate me to no end some days; then other days they are the most thoughtful and sweet girls. They really know how to push my buttons while we're out running errands, but I really love when they calm down while we relax at home. My oldest is a know-it-all (at 3! I thought for sure that wasn't coming until the teenage years!), but she can say the silliest things sometimes and we laugh so hard! My 2 year old is really coming into her own lately, and she really enjoys conversation instead of just playing. While we drive to the store or wherever, she asks some thought-provoking questions or makes up scenarios for whatever she catches a glimpse at as we drive by. Her creativity overwhelms me, and I just can't wait to see how she'll use that in the next few years in school. My 'baby' who just turned 1 has developed quite a personality and really became a Daddy's girl over the last few weeks. Even though she whines when I'm not around, she has such a joyous and excited expression when Daddy gets home or is playing with the older 2. She really wants to crawl over there and lie on him. It is adorable to see him interact with them....sometimes looking to me for translation of their phrases or stories. :)

For all the worries we have as adults, our kids are so carefree and loving life.....which is exactly how I believe it should be. They love people and animals and everything. They have their moments of crying when they're hurt or upset or angry, but give them 2 minutes and they are back to their amazement of the world. They don't hold grudges, don't care what others think about them or their appearance, don't pay attention to all the dirt and germs that sometimes drive me crazy trying to clean up. They just love life. I hope my children are always loving life and loving everything life has to offer.

Nivea at CVS; Scrubbing Bubbles at Target

CVS has a sale on Nivea body wash and shower gel this week, as well as Nivea lip care. I bought 3 Nivea 16 ounce body washes and 1 Cherry Lip Balm for around $16. I used 3 of the $4 off for each of the body wash and 1 of the $1 off for the lip balm. Because I reached $15 pre-coupons, I got 5 ECB's back. So, I paid $6.39 (for items and tax) and got 5 back! 3 body washes and a lip balm for $1.39....not bad!

Later, I plan to head to Target to buy 2 of the Scrubbing Bubbles Extend-A-Clean bottles that are on sale for $7.99; I will use two $5 off coupons and pay around $7 and get two $5 gift cards back. I plan to use that $10 to get my girls some shorts. Seems we go through them soooo fast....and Mondays are the day Target moves kid clothing to clearance (or already clearance items move up in clearnance percentage - 30% now 50%). Hoping to get a few pairs for my older girls.

Happy Monday!

Time Off

I didn't realize how much of a stickler I am about routine until my husband took some time off this month. Yikes! I liked to think that I was go-with-the-flow and kind of just did whatever we wanted each day, other than on preschool days. I guess I was wrong. I am exactly the opposite - I have a mental schedule that I stick to very strictly and boy am I a grouch when we deviate from that schedule!

For a while I was following the FlyLady (www.flylady.net) with regard to my cleaning and organizing schedules. She has a lot of great information for organization and time management when it comes to keeping the home clean....and by clean I mean SPOTLESS. I became pretty obsessed with cleaning for a little while, until I realized that maybe her schedules didn't fit a family of 5, including a very new newborn. So, I dropped her schedule, though I continue to receive her emails - guess I couldn't completely let go of that addiction. :)

Next, I tried to keep a few tips of FlyLady's and incorporate them into my own schedule. That worked, but then I fell into some sort of funk during the winter months because we were stuck inside a lot due to weather. I felt like I was cleaning the same things every other day....and they weren't even dirty! I gave up on that because it just made me angry.

And now, I keep no cleaning schedule (on paper, anyway). I just clean as needed and do a good deep-clean weekly or when I can get to it. At least, I THOUGHT that's how I was doing it. I guess not.

My husband's first day off last week was laundry day. I thought I was going to blow a fuse because I couldn't get as much done as I normally can on a Monday. I made the mistake, though, of verbalizing that and hurt his feelings. I made it seem like I didn't even want him home! The rest of last week is a blur because I was rushing around buying food and preparing for my youngest's first birthday parties (yes, she had 2 of them. ugh.). I overspent on the food because I was unprepared for the shopping and I was rushing around last minute trying to put together the cakes and packing and cleaning. We ended up in Indiana Thurs-Sat, so I wasn't going to have time to clean before the 2nd party here on Sunday. I didn't plan out my week well, so I spent Thursday morning running around and crying. Yes, crying. My husband probably thought I was nuts. I was crying because Dominick's didn't have peppers on sale, and I spent $6 for 3 peppers. I still think that's a ridiculous amount of money, but I needed them. I was just so frustrated, and the peppers were the last straw. I was able to get it together in time to go and enjoy some time at my parents' house this weekend. I had a mini-meltdown Sunday when the rice just wouldn't cook! Crunchy rice doesn't make for a very nice Arroz con Pollo. I guess that's what I get for trying so hard. Should have stuck with the simple - hot dogs and hamburgers.

Anyway, today he's back at work for a half day then has tomorrow and Friday off before going back to his regular schedule. I am learning much about myself. I am a huge grouch when I can't do what I want to do. Go figure. I suppose my parents could've told me that one. :) I think I will be upset with myself for not enjoying this time off more, but I will also enjoy getting "back to normal." I think we'll have a few months before he has several days off again. And I'm sure by then I'll be griping about having to do everything myself because of his work schedule.

I wish I could just turn off my scheduled self when I needed to, to just enjoy my family and our time together. We did have a lot of fun. Went to the Museum of Science and Industry last Wednesday. The girls got to see and do a lot of things. It was fun to watch them explore and process and just observe all the things out there. I had a great time with both sides of the family for the parties. My Baby is 1 year old now! I can't believe it. I baby her a lot still, but I guess she's really growing up fast.

Now, if I could just get her to sleep in her own bed through the night.....(ya, don't get me started on that one. there might be tears...)

Musem's Free Admission!!

This week, the Museum of Science and Industry has free general admission. I heard it's in honor of Earth Week, but I don't know if that's accurate. Regardless of the reason, it's free!! We plan to go tomorrow and take the girls. The Omnimax pricing is different on free days ($8 for adults, $6 for kids age 3-11). So, $22 for us all to get in AND see the Omnimax feature; I think we'll see the Tahiti surfing feature, instead of the Hubble movie.....the girls will like the surfing more!

Also this week, the Disney store is celebrating Earth Day on April 22 by giving away free hats (made of 100% recycled materials) to those that bring in 6 or more bottles or cans to recycle. Limit is 1 hat per customer/guest, and you must have 6 bottles/cans to recycle. I will probably take the girls in to do that one. We recycle anyway, so I'm sure we can find 6 cans or bottles for the 2 older girls to toss in.

Kellogg's All-Bran Samples

I received a sample size box of Kellogg's Bran Buds cereal. I thought they'd be a good snack for my almost 1 year old......until I tasted them. They're just as bland as the All-Bran cereal. My daughter did NOT like them; in fact, she spit them out. I tried a handful....and wanted to spit mine out, too. My 2 and 3 years old daughters did not like them much either.

We will probably not be buying them unless they are ridiculously cheap or free. The only use for them I'd have then would be for making my bran muffins.

The second sample Kelloggs sent was the All-Bran Wheat Flakes. Those were pretty tasty. Similar to Corn Flakes. The girls and I enjoyed that sample size, and I would consider buying those again. They contain a good helping of fiber and are made with wheat bran.

So, yay for the Wheat Flakes and nay for the bran buds.

Lost in Loans

So, our computer was acting crazy last week. Then it just stopped working. GRRRR! It was only a little over 2 years old, so I was very angry. Best Buy took a look....for $170; they said we had 354 viral threats on the computer but that the hard drive was fine. Phew! Except, it was going to cost an additional $130 to TRY and repair the OS, and if that didn't work then it was damage to something physical and would have to be sent out for parts. Well, the tower wasn't even worth the $300 we'd be putting into it, so we decided to get a new one. Of course, we had not been saving to purchase a new computer, so this was going to come out of pocket. We are doing the debt-free living these days, so there was no way we were going to charge/finance a new one. The Apple computers/laptops/iPads looked great, but not for a whopping $1000! We went with a simple Asus netbook and just got the external hard drive and portable CD drive for the additional needs we have. All in all, it's a great computer. Total purchase was under $700, and we can still do everything we could before....plus, now we're mobile with it! So, God really provided by making it affordable with the computer, extra drives, and the 2 yr protection plan. We paid cash and don't have to worry about a monthly payment......just replenishing our emergency fund now.

It seemed like a little thing at the time, but God really did a HUGE thing for us by providing for us to be able to pay cash. Credit cards seem like no big deals some times, but they really eat up your money. I'm very thankful that God has allowed to be living without the credit card for almost 3 months now! Not very long, but that's the longest we've gone I think. Zero balance means zero interest and zero monies owed to someone else. Now, we're paying down the car loans....I never want to finance a car again. What a waste of money. If we can pay them both off in the next 12 months, we'll be in really good shape to start knocking down the house loan and putting away money in investments and the girls' funds. We have just a little in their accounts now, but if we can stop paying on loans (except for the house), then we can definitely set aside much more for the girls' education.

God does so much for us between paychecks. And we definitely haven't been able to live without the big money worries until we started tithing. Seriously. Seems ridiculous and doesn't make sense sometimes, but we actually have MORE money each pay period after we give the tithe. Weird, I know, but God is doing just as He promised He would if we obeyed....He's taking care of the things we need and He's even blessing us beyond that. Of course, we (humanly) still worry about money every week....which is silly because we've never been without - never missed a meal, a bill, a tuition payment, etc.

I know God will continue to take care of and bless us as long as we're doing what He's asked and doing it with the right heart - not grudgingly but rather with a grateful spirit. We are all responsible for the things He's entrusted to us. That is one of the many reasons I like to coupon. He has given me a great responsibility to manage for the househould and family needs. My husband manages our checkbook, but I have the cash that takes care of groceries and clothing and gas and whatnot. Why would I NOT want to do everything I can to handle it properly and wisely, so that we can enjoy the fruits of our labor rather than spoil them by buying anything and everything?!

My goal is to always be aware of what and how I'm spending and to remember to be thankful constantly for God's provision and to trust Him to do as He's promised as long as I do as He's asked. What a great God I have! Thank You, Jesus, for Your blessings and guidance.

Strawberry Cream Cheese Muffins and Savings

I made Strawberry Cream Cheese Muffins last Friday. Delicious! Found the recipe in my Cooking Club magazine. I was hesitant in making them simply because I'd never had strawberries in bread or muffins before and wasn't quite sure how the texture would be after baking. I was pleasantly surprised when I tasted them. The chunk of cream cheese in the middle really made them great! My girls liked them, too. I gave a couple away to friends and family, who all gave good reviews as well. The only thing I didn't do was take a picture of them! Ugh! I could have shared them on here, but oh well. Maybe next time...

Also, I planned a trip to both Jewel and Dominick's for yesterday just to grab a few sale items, since I wouldn't be doing an actual grocery trip until Thursday after the sales ended. I scored 4 jumbo packs of Baby Basics diapers from Jewel for only $12! They were on sale for $7.99 each, so I bought 4 to get over $30 and trigger the $10 back coupon at the register. So, That brought me to $20 and I had some Your Bucks left over after first coming in and purchasing Post cereals with coupons and getting discounts and Your Bucks back. So, the 4 packages of diapers were a good deal. And now I have $10 for Jewel to use on my next baby purchase! More diapers! :)

I also went to Dominicks to get some V-8 VFusion juices for $1.74 each (2), 2 bologna packages for $1, an 8 pack of Gatorade for $4.49 (not a great sale, but it'll do!), eggs for $.69 (they were $1.39 with an odd 50% clearance sticker on them; I think because their expiration is the 19th), and a few other cheap items. Total there was $11.

Today, I transferred a prescription online from Walgreens over to CVS and went in to pick it up and scored a $25 CVS gift card as well as my 2% earnings from my winter spending (only $4, but I'll do better this next quarter!). So, all in all, it was a good start to my week. I spent $5 today on the prescription and got back $29 to use at CVS! Can't wait for tomorrow's paper to get here with the new sales ads, so I can map out my shopping for Thursday or Friday.

After naps, we have to head back to CVS as I forgot to buy milk. DUH! And I'll see what other things I can score with the gift card and get back some ECB's!

God has been extremely good lately. Ok, so He's always extremely good, but I'm really starting to be aware of how He provides and how He helps remind me how to wisely use our family's money to get what we need, a few things we like, and how to keep saving for the future!